


you've been pouring gasoline in your living room

by vinndetta



Series: universe jumping [4]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, M/M, Open to Interpretation, a look at the Other universe, although it could be him making up an elaborate lie, but dan probably does tell arin, not sure if i'll write that out though, the ending is vague but it's implied dan tells this arin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-23
Updated: 2018-12-23
Packaged: 2019-09-25 05:48:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,751
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17115599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vinndetta/pseuds/vinndetta
Summary: Arin didn't notice the changes in his husband until they were in the eye of the hurricane with no safe way out.





	you've been pouring gasoline in your living room

**Author's Note:**

> title credits:  
> undo  
> by ultraviolet
> 
> -
> 
> honestly, i prefer writing these fics with no dialogue, but it was necessary. anyway... here's other arin's POV. next, i might switch to original universe's Brian or back to Dan. Who knows lol. not I.

Arin didn't notice when it started, which surprised him. He's usually an observant person with an eye for detail. That's one of the things that he prides himself on, yet somehow this had slipped under his nose.

-

Nothing had made sense when Dan had pushed him away. 

He knew that Dan wasn't exactly the best at relationships, and being married to a guy was probably something he'd never even considered. On top of that, Dan liked to retreat into himself and not be bothered at times. Arin understood that, so he often let Dan have his personal space until Dan came back out wanting cuddles

But it was very uncharacteristic of Dan to panic at the sight of Arin getting closer, pushing him away as if he was in shock.

-

Arin felt like this was the finishing puzzle piece to the jigsaw puzzle that he didn't even know existed. He figured out the gameplay before he had even realized that there was a game afoot.

Well, he's the video game boy. He's the one who wins. He has to win.

And, in this case, winning is just a matter of figuring out what's happening with Dan.

-

Dan had been acting weird upon further reflection, but Arin had just chalked it up to something personal. Dan had always come to him when things got too much, so he just let it slide, assuming that Dan would call for help when he needed it.

But this was a different kind of weird. 

Dan...

You'd think that after you've been married for about three years, been in a relationship for five years, and been friends for six years, you'd know practically everything you'd need to know about your partner. And they really did have that bond.

But lately, it's almost as if Dan is an absolutely different person. Sometimes, Dan's alright, comfortably interacting with Arin the way they've been ever since they met. Other times, Arin will make a gay joke and Dan will freeze up, as if he's completely unprepared for it. Other times, Dan will forget something, and Arin will have to remind him about the location of their first kiss, their honeymoon destinations, or whatever else. It's one thing to forget something occasionally, but Dan sometimes even seems to forget that they're even together.

Arin doesn't know what to make of this.

-

Dan's crying, he realizes, as Arin's drowsiness is swept away by the fact that his lover is crying in bed next to him.

What's happening? He doesn't know what to do, just freezes as he hears the broken sobs coming from Dan. He doesn't know what's happened; they had just had sex earlier that evening, and now he's being awoken by choked sobbing.

Was it that bad? Dan seemed to enjoy it in the moment. Did he mess up? He doesn't think this is a regular occurrence at all. As a light sleeper, he's usually up at the slightest noise.

No, this was the first time that he's woken up to an emotional Dan after sex.

These aren't good emotions. It sounds like he's in distress.

But Arin just freezes.

What's with Dan? He's usually vocal about anything that's uncomfortable with, especially in bed (at Arin's insistence all those years ago).

-

The next day, Dan doesn't seem to have remembered anything at all about last night.

In fact, he seems to have forgotten entirely about last night, about yesterday in general.

Something weird is afoot, and Arin wants to find out what.

-

After a while, the two Dans seem to converge - there's less hiccups about certain things that Dan should be remembering, and Dan seems to be much more comfortable around him.

But that's when the push happens.

-

The day before had been fine - it was a chill day, where Arin was playing video games and Dan was on the sidelines, watching and cuddling with Arin. It was like Game Grumps, but they were just fooling around, not doing any sort of recording. It had been really fun, and Arin loved to do stupid stuff to make his husband laugh, which was the most beautiful sound in the world to him.

But when Dan woke up, he seemed to be in a mood. Not a good mood, but actually, the kind of mood where you feel the negative aura just pouring out of that person, like they'll snap if you look at them wrong.

Arin had just been trying to alleviate the problem, to try to soothe Dan and get him to relax and maybe talk about the issues he was going through.

Unfortunately, before he could open his mouth to ask if he wanted kisses and cuddles, Dan's face had flashed with fear, pushing Arin away. 

Arin hadn't tumbled over, holding his ground, but Dan had pushed him hard. Not that it was at full force, so Arin knew that his body wouldn't lose his balance and fall over.

His heart, on the other hand, was a completely different situation.

-

He didn't hear any protesting coming from the master bedroom when he stalked away, muttering under his breath about kisses and cuddles. That's all he wanted, and Dan just decided to push him away like he didn't want him, like he was scared of him.

God, what the hell was happening to his husband?

As he went towards the couch and put on a random TV show, his anger dissipated, leaving only confusion and hurt behind.

He only wanted the best for Dan, but he didn't understand what to do. Dan had never acted like this before. From best friends to boyfriends to husbands, the two of them had hardly ever found anything that they couldn't talk about, had never had any issues that couldn't be solved via communicating, and had never found themselves in a situation that they couldn't handle together. So, what had changed? What was going through Dan's mind? 

Arin doesn't know, just lets the television play in the background as he puts his head in his hands.

With a couple of tears falling, he prays that Dan's going to be okay. Even if he didn't know what to do, or if he could do anything, Arin hopes that Dan knows that he's always going to be there for him, for emotional support.

-

It turns out that Dan is the one who speaks up two days later.

He's sitting on the couch, laying back his head and taking what seemed to be a vertical nap. Arin closes the door gently and puts down the grocery bags. He can deal with those later -- they're not going to perish if he turns towards his priorities (Dan) first.

Arin's steps are soft as he approaches, sitting down quietly as possible on the couch. But Dan's already widened his eyes and turned towards Arin at lightning speed.

"Arin-"

"Shh... let's just..." Arin leans into Dan, signalling him to stay quiet and in the moment. They both sit there for minutes, maybe even half an hour, just listening to each other breathe. If Arin closes his eyes and concentrates, he thinks he can feel Dan's heartbeat from where both bodies connect. If Arin could, he'd be like this forever, feeling enveloped by his husband's presence. He never wants to leave Dan's side, only wants Dan all to himself. He could spend forever, just like this.

But this isn't a fanfiction, isn't a made-up story where things always end up perfect. This is reality, Arin thinks with a bitter taste in his mouth. Not everything can be resolved beautifully.

As if on cue, Dan breaks the silence.

"Arin."

The word rings through the air, rings through Arin's head. He used to love the way that Dan said his name, with all that adoration and love. But now.... now, it's so different. Because that _Arin_ that comes from Dan's mouth now... it scares him. It's no longer familiar, it's no longer loving, it's... almost fearful.

"We need to talk." Dan continues, biting his lip. 

Arin reaches over to grab Dan's hand to comfort him. His grasp is tight; he wants to convey something without words, hoping his actions is enough to show what he's thinking inside, that there's no reason to be afraid, that Arin will always be there for him, to give him strength and love-

But it seems to make it worse, as Dan suddenly pulls his hand away quickly.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I can't!" Dan babbles, and puts his head in his hands. He starts shaking, and Arin's heart drops. "I can't, I just can't..."

"Just come on, just tell me what's wrong?" Arin whispers with a hint of concern in his voice. He looks to Dan, the man he loves, supposedly crying and shaking in what seems to be fear and doubt right in front of him.

And he doesn't know what to do.

Years and years spent together... and Arin has never dealt with this before. He's tried brushing it off, comforting him, anything he can think of... but it's not working. No matter what Arin tries to do, Dan's still...

Dan...

"Yeah, I.. I will. Just... give me some time..." Dan lowers his hands, looking up at Arin. His eyes are glossy and he looks like a vulnerable child. Arin looks into Dan's eyes, and he feels like he's a parent who just found out their child had disobeyed a rule.

It's the worst feeling in the world.

"All the time you need." Arin whispers. And he means it.

Dan smiles softly, and Arin can almost pretend that everything is okay as he looks at his husband. Despite everything that just happened, all that emotional buildup, Arin thinks that Dan is still beautiful, the most beautiful man he's ever met. He wants to pretend so bad, but once you know the truth, it's hard to get it to unstick from your mind.

"... Is tomorrow okay?" Dan asks, eyes looking down at the ground.

Arin blinks. This is so unlike the Dan that he knew. Where was the Dan that he fell in love with, the one that he married, the one he swore to spend the rest of his life with?

Maybe he's changed. And they've sworn to go through life together, no matter what changes and obstacles are thrown at them. 

All that Arin knows is that he's willing to learn, willing to accept. He knows that as long as Dan's at his side, there's nothing he won't be able to handle.

"Tomorrow's perfect."

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed this chapter! comments/kudos = the fucking best!
> 
> i'm @vinndetta on tumblr and dreamwidth (though the latter i literally just made so.... haha it's super rough lmao) and i'm also /vinndetta on ko-fi if you'd like to support my writing! :) thank you so much, hope you have a great day!


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